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Worst Absinthe Misinformation You Have Ever Heard

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I have thought about posting this thread after a friend of mine, once getting on the topic of Absinthe, told me such bullshit I thought for sure he was making it up.

 

I invite you to relate your worst Absinthe misinformation you have ever heard from anyone.

 

I often run into the typical stuff, especially that it is illegal in Canadia, but, it is almost a kind of bigotry and often I get his attitude like I was talking about Crystal Meth or some other harsh drug.

 

I realize we usually speak of the steeping wormwood in high potency alcohol and that Van Gough killed himself because of it as typical bullshit, but once you hear this you'll get that my point, even though it contains some of that, is to post the most outrageous crap you have ever heard.

 

* gets another drink * :cheers:

 

Okay, so while out with friends at a local bar, we get on the topic of Absinthe, it not ever having been illegal here in Canadia and the crap that's available here and my friend pipes up with, "Yeah, right after the ban was lifted, we went out got some of the good stuff from the liquor store and tried it about two years ago."

 

"Hills, you mean, and it was never banned here."

 

"No, it wasn't that. It was blue"

 

"Yes, Hills or Green Tree."

 

"No it was different than that. This was right after the ban."

 

"It was never banned here. Hills is blue."

 

"Yeah, but, I was Tripping Balz®."

 

"It doesn't make you hallucinate."

 

"Well, I did."

 

"It doesn't."

 

"A kind from India does, it must have been that. It had a worm on the bottom." :shock:

 

WTF??? I had no idea how to respond. Tequila with food colouring with a picture of a sacred cow on it, or even worse, Vishnu?

 

Anyone heard anything worse that that?

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For some odd reason, lots of people think of Tequila when you say Absinthe. I fail to see where this connection comes from, but it is definately there.

 

I have never heard that before. Hmmm.... I think he knows what Tequils is, though. I think the blue colour gives it away.

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Someone recently asked about Absinthe on a different web forum that I frequent, and half the responses to the query ended up talking about Tequila. People did generally realize their error however. Lots of comments about "Isn't that the stuff with the worm on the bottom, that makes you hallucinate". Have these people seen too much Fear and Loathing or something? What's up with all the hallucenogenic worms?

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Someone recently asked about Absinthe on a different web forum that I frequent, and half the responses to the query ended up talking about Tequila....

 

What's up with all the hallucenogenic worms?

 

Well, that's just weird. I thought everyone knows what Tequila is?

 

However, the trippy worm comes from the urban myth, I think, that the worm at the bottom of Mescal is a Mescalin Worm. Mescalin doesn't come from worms, of course, but people always said it was a worm that ate it and eating the worm made you trip.

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Man, people are just really, painfully, dumb aren't they? Don't people learn anymore? Read books? Look stuff up?

 

Don't bother answering those questions, I konw the answers are Yes, No, No, No.

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People seem to get things confused quite often. The Mezcal "worm" is like the twigs at the bottom of King of Spirits, lots of rumors and trippage claims but in the end it's a marketing gimmic that denotes low quality. The worm (really a caterpillar) is normally only found on unhealthy and poorly taken care of agave plants.

 

It's amazing what people will believe if you tack on, "will get you high" at the end.

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The dumbest thing I ever heard was on that patchouli-reeking moron site Erowid.

Some fool said Absinthe was aged in wormwood casks and that's what gave it the hallucinogenic properties.

 

WORMWOOD CASKS? :laf:

 

I'll have to remember to send the person who posted that out to get me some skyhooks and camouflage paint.

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....Some fool said Absinthe was aged in wormwood casks and that's what gave it the hallucinogenic properties.

 

WORMWOOD CASKS? :laf:

 

I'll have to remember to send the person who posted that out to get me some skyhooks and camouflage paint.

 

Reading some of these Absinth sites, I guess I should have known that the unknown quality of it gives everyone, even people who have no interest in selling the mystique, the license to make up any :censor1: they feel like to make themselves look knowledgable.

 

Or even worse, their crap is fourth or fifth hand :censor1: someone made up once to be funny or because they didn't and people bought it and passed it along.

 

I worked at a pulp mill in a section called the Steam Plant and they sent me out to get a bucket of BTUs, but I knew that it is a measure of heat energy so I brought them back a steaming bucket, (with steam only, nothing offensive). High comedy that.

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I haven't heard any amazingly stupid stuff. According to some friends who I've tried to correct, absinthe eats your brain because of the worm wood alcohol in it. You can't buy real absinthe anymore all the stuff you can get today is fake, but they know someone who has "made" "real" absinthe (they never tried the homemade).

 

Drug sites are some of the best places to find funny stuff about absinthe.

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I had a bartender tell me absinthe was an opiate. I tried to reason with him, but it was no good. Last time I checked poppy was not an ingredient in absinthe.

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I worked at a pulp mill in a section called the Steam Plant and they sent me out to get a bucket of BTUs, but I knew that it is a measure of heat energy so I brought them back a steaming bucket, (with steam only, nothing offensive).  High comedy that.

 

Funny, I work in the sound business, and we sent our new intern out to get some more Decibels (DBs) so we could make the mix louder. We told him to go down to washington square park and ask the guy with the dreadlocks on the corner. Once he got there, he realized we were fucking with him and so he brought back a dimebag of pot from the park and said "I got you 10 DBs". He got promoted pretty quickly...

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Idiot sites are a dime a billion, but personal anecdotes are even more entertaining because you get to see people's expressions when you re-form their universe for them.

 

I've had someone ask me "You actually drink that stuff? Isn't it poison?" As if it were strychnine or something.

 

I've also been assured, in a very authoritative tone, that the real thing contains opium. Any idiot knows that.

 

Also, the best, authentic absinthe comes from Czechia, where it really started like, five hundred years ago.

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Before I knew anything about Absinthe I had a friend from the UK tell me that he wanted to try it after hearing that a friend of his had.

 

He told me that it was illegal but one could get fake stuff in England. His friend got the "real thing" from the Czech (one could tell it was the real thing because it had the actual wormwood shavings in the bottle). The wormwood made his friend hallucinate or at least see a flock of birds form a mathematical equation before plunging into the Themes only to reemerge from the water and provide the solution.

 

I also like the Van Helsing movie quote where the girl says "Don't let it touch your toungue or it will knock you on your ass."

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when telling friends and aquaintances about my new obsession, I met one dude who had had some absinthe from spain and was very interested in what I was learning about French and Swiss absinthe. The two of us joked that next we want to try laudanum. His girlfriend then told us that laudanum was absinthe and opium.....

 

I had to explain tactfully that it was not, that it was alcohol and opium. I didn't want to insult her or the guy I had only met two or three days before.

 

since then, a few folks I've spoken with have been convinced that absinthe was an opiate.

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Porkio had it right, Erowid. Back in the day, when there were no other sites besides Feeverte and Erowid, it led many astray.

 

In the radio broadcast in Seattle, I heard the DJ BJ say something about absinthe being in the bible. That's gotta count for something in the idiot awards.

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I heard the DJ BJ say something about absinthe being in the bible. That's gotta count for something in the idiot awards.

The third angel sounded his trumpet, and a great star, blazing like a torch, fell from the sky on a third of the rivers and on the springs of water— the name of the star is Wormwood.[a] A third of the waters turned bitter, and many people died from the waters that had become bitter.

Either Revelations or the Book of Jorge -- can't recall right off hand.

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A friend and his wife came over for dinner the other night. I offered them some absinthe. The wife asked, "what is it?" and before I could reply my friend explained that it was very popular with artists and writers in the nineteenth century and contained "a naturally occurring form of LSD."

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I heard the DJ BJ say something about absinthe being in the bible. That's gotta count for something in the idiot awards.

The third angel sounded his trumpet, and a great star, blazing like a torch, fell from the sky on a third of the rivers and on the springs of water— the name of the star is Wormwood.[a] A third of the waters turned bitter, and many people died from the waters that had become bitter.

Either Revelations or the Book of Jorge -- can't recall right off hand.

 

According to David Thewlis in the Mike Leigh film Naked, the Russian translation for the word wormwood is Chernobyl. I think that's some Nostradamus type BS though, as Wormwood is Russian is ??????, whereas Chernobyl in Russian is ????????.

 

Edit: I tried to in put the cyrillic characters but the site won't display them. Oh well, the bottom line is they're different.

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:devil: Deuteronomy 29:18

Lest there should be among you man, or woman, or family, or tribe, whose heart turneth away this day from the LORD our God, to go and serve the gods of these nations; lest there should be among you a root that beareth gall and wormwood;

 

Proverbs 5:4

But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.

 

Jeremiah 9:15

 

Therefore thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; Behold, I will feed them, even this people, with wormwood, and give them water of gall to drink.

 

 

Amos 5:7

 

Ye who turn judgment to wormwood, and leave off righteousness in the earth,

 

Revelation 8:10

 

And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter. :devil:

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No religion, byatch... boot him HIRAM!!

 

Make sure there is no man or woman, clan or tribe among you today whose heart turns away from the LORD our God to go and worship the gods of those nations; make sure there is no root among you that produces such bitter poison.

 

For the lips of an adulteress drip honey,

and her speech is smoother than oil;

but in the end she is bitter as gall,

sharp as a double-edged sword.

 

[i really like this quote from Proverbs 5:23,

He will die for lack of discipline,

led astray by his own great folly. ]

 

Therefore, this is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says: "See, I will make this people eat bitter food and drink poisoned water.

 

You who turn justice into bitterness

and cast righteousness to the ground

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