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Absinthe Jokes?


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#31 MASTERPC

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Posted 16 January 2007 - 05:21 AM

For Alan:

Strange coincidence
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.

The woman perks up and says, "How about that? I just ordered a glass of Champagne , too!"

"What a coincidence," the farmer says, "This is a special day for me, and I'm celebrating."

"This is a special day for me too, I'm also celebrating!" says the woman.

"What a coincidence!" says the man. As they clinked glasses the farmer asked, "What are you celebrating?"

"My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my Gynecologist told me that I'm pregnant!"

"What a coincidence," says the man, "I'm a chicken farmer and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they're finally laying fertilized eggs."

"That's great!" says the woman, "How did your chickens become fertile?"
"I used a different cock," he replied.

The woman smiled and said, "What a coincidence. . ."
"I read an article recently on the dangers of heavy drinking..
Scared the shit out of me.
So, that's it! After today, no more reading."

#32 OMG_Bill

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Posted 16 January 2007 - 06:03 AM

:blink:
Some folks may cringe each time I use the term "Booze" regarding these high quality drinks.
I mean no offense. There are bottles of extraordinary booze out there. I've tasted a few. Relax.

#33 Absomphe

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Posted 16 January 2007 - 08:17 AM

Actually, that wasn't too bad, MPC.

Yes, I'm Krinkles the Clown on an absinthe a beer bender.

You got a problem with that?


#34 ShaiHulud

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 12:00 PM

She shouldn't be drinking if she is pregnant
Litany against fear of Absinthe - I must not fear Absinthe. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my Absinthe. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the Absinthe has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

#35 DesertWolf

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 12:04 PM

That's it Shai, just kill the joke......
I start to feel like I am in an existentialist play written by a person with multiple personality disorder...

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." -- Philip K. Dick

"I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart." -- ee cummings

#36 ShaiHulud

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 12:08 PM

you know how I like to look out for babies
Litany against fear of Absinthe - I must not fear Absinthe. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my Absinthe. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the Absinthe has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

#37 MASTERPC

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 12:10 PM

:puke:
"I read an article recently on the dangers of heavy drinking..
Scared the shit out of me.
So, that's it! After today, no more reading."

#38 DesertWolf

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 12:15 PM

:huh: :dribble: :no:
And I thought we were going to leave that subject in the other thread....

Edited by DesertWolf, 18 January 2007 - 12:18 PM.

I start to feel like I am in an existentialist play written by a person with multiple personality disorder...

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." -- Philip K. Dick

"I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart." -- ee cummings

#39 Absomphe

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 02:23 PM

Suddenly, I'm Ravenous...like the movie with the same title. :devil:

Yes, I'm Krinkles the Clown on an absinthe a beer bender.

You got a problem with that?


#40 Grey Boy

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Posted 18 January 2007 - 02:32 PM

you know how I like to look out for babies

HA!
I'm gonna meet pierreverte!

#41 skol312000

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Posted 20 January 2007 - 08:30 AM

Not funny.

#42 elfnmagik

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Posted 20 January 2007 - 08:37 AM

:g:
"I really like depriving myself of things. It's fun! Very monastic." - Kosmo

#43 Absomphe

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Posted 20 January 2007 - 09:55 AM

Not funny.


Um, yes.

Yes, it wahhhhhs.

Yes, I'm Krinkles the Clown on an absinthe a beer bender.

You got a problem with that?


#44 jcbphd

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Posted 20 January 2007 - 09:59 AM

you know how I like to "look out" for babies


How dingo-esque of you! :harhar:
Temperance, like chastity, is its own punishment. ~Four Vines "The Peasant"

Ça descend la gorge comme le bébé Jésus en culottes de velours.

You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough. ~Frank Crane

#45 Sonny Mann

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Posted 14 February 2007 - 04:23 PM

A drunk is sitting at the bar in an unknown town when a woman at the end of the bar raises a bare arm
revealing a rather hairy armpit and says: "Who will buy a lady an Absinthe?"

The drunk says: "I'll buy a drink for the ballerina."

A short time later, the same woman, raises the same bare arm exposing that more than hirsute armpit and says:
"Who will buy a lady an Absinthe?"

The drunk says: "I'll buy a drink for the ballerina."

This happens a few more times and finally the bartender says: "Why do you keep calling that woman a ballerina?"

The drunk says: "I thought that anyone who could get their leg that far over their head MUST be a ballerina."
"I don't think very much....therefore, I might not be"

#46 Brian Robinson

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Posted 14 February 2007 - 04:26 PM

:laf:
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Help other absintheurs and newcomers by submitting a review. Click here to go to the main review page to submit your entry.

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#47 Bluescat

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Posted 14 February 2007 - 04:46 PM

:laf: Oh I just love him! :heart:
Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify.
- Henry David Thoreau

#48 MASTERPC

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Posted 14 February 2007 - 05:35 PM

Oh, uh uh! :laf:
"I read an article recently on the dangers of heavy drinking..
Scared the shit out of me.
So, that's it! After today, no more reading."

#49 DesertWolf

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Posted 14 February 2007 - 08:51 PM

:laf: :shock: :laf:
I start to feel like I am in an existentialist play written by a person with multiple personality disorder...

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." -- Philip K. Dick

"I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart." -- ee cummings

#50 OMG_Bill

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Posted 14 February 2007 - 09:19 PM

:shock: :laf:

:cheers:
Some folks may cringe each time I use the term "Booze" regarding these high quality drinks.
I mean no offense. There are bottles of extraordinary booze out there. I've tasted a few. Relax.

#51 Bluescat

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Posted 15 February 2007 - 05:11 PM

:laf: I just read it again!!! :laf:
Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify.
- Henry David Thoreau


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